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Pills, Pain, & Poetry

So what has influenced most of the music we have come to know as rock? Which has been the most creative influence? That’s right. Drugs.

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Alternative music has become the stem of many an obsession and childlike curiosity since it began. We know NME love it – but why do we, as fans of alternative music spend our time digesting album after album of musical genius from Hendrix to The Hives, from the Beatles to the Beastie Boys?  Well, because true music fans appreciate the depth and meaning to most of the lyrics and themes within a song, the insight into the artist. Whether its about love, hate, war, peace; relationships, or even politics, the artist has poured his soul; his very being into making the poetry appear before him; and as fans of ‘proper music’ we appreciate the attention to detail which makes the lyrics we love so powerful. This isn’t manufactured, bubblegum pop shite that we’re talking about here – this is real music, our passion and our lifeline.

Influence is a powerful thing. Without the influence of the Brit-Pop indie explosion of the nineties – Blur, Oasis and Pulp to name but a few (The Stone Roses anyone?) many of our favorite bands today – The Strokes, Ash and even Keane wouldn’t have become the successes they are today. Without The Smiths, we wouldn’t have Oasis – Noel said the second he saw The Smiths on Top Of The Pops he was sold. It launches creativity, and it’s clear from the bands and music we know and love that it played a major role in producing the album, the track, even the image of a band. When you listen to many artists, listen properly to an entire album, it tells a story: the life and soul of whomever wrote it is being laid out before you.

So what has influenced most of the music we have come to know as rock? Which has been the most creative influence? That’s right. Drugs.

In itself it’s quite a ‘taboo’ subject, down to the law and the boys in blue. Yet no one can argue the strength of its creative influence in the alternative music industry: so many acts and legends have passed before us, talented, free thinking, inspired – and considerably high the entire time! The Beatles, Jimi Hendrix, The Who, Pink Floyd, The Red Hot Chili Peppers, Metallica, The Beach Boys, and even modern successes such as The White Stripes and Oasis have illegal substances to thank for part of their success and inspiration. Purple HazeSgt. Pepper, and Dark Side Of The Moon are legendary records we all have on our shelves – so again we must thank the highs that helped create them. What’s even more intriguing is how drug use has linked all these bands together – for example, remember The Who’s Keith Moon and his drug problems? Whilst under the influence, one of our favorite drummers drove a brand new Rolls Royce into Pink Floyd’s swimming pool, Pink Floyd being another band out of their tree from drug use. Oasis – the Mancunian indie heroes – covered the entire event via the artwork on their Be Here Now album.

Three different bands, different eras, different sounds – all linked together by drugs such as heroin, cocaine, PCP, mushrooms, and LSD. Drugs shaped the creative output of many successful alternative musicians – and here’s how.

Because I Got High

That line from the famous Afroman song, for a little while, became a catchphrase for the nation. It screamed ‘MARAJUANA’ at us, promoted its use (not that many of us needed converting anyway) – yet did many of the younger fans of the song truly understand the meaning of the term ‘high’? Probably not. But it’s not always obvious, despite your drunken boasting that you know everything about rock – we don’t always click when bands write drug related material, even if you are down with the ghetto terms for cocaine, mofo. Your favorite record could have been written when the artist was high on marijuana, LSD, or cocaine…and you probably didn’t realize.

Pink Floyd are an excellent example of this. In their song “Flaming,” they sing: “Alone in the clouds all blue… sitting on a unicorn… sleeping on a dandelion.” Reading those words now, you must be questioning whether they make sense at all. Talking about ‘unicorns,’ ‘sleeping on dandelions’ and ‘being alone in the clouds’ screams hallucinations – they must’ve been on the ceiling when they penned this tune. And in fact, when looking into a lot of lyrics that were written whilst the artists were ‘under the influence,’ it is noticeable that they weren’t really writing with a sober mind.

In a song by The White Stripes on the White Blood Cells LP, Jack White wrote:

“You thought you heard a sound
There’s no one else around
Looking at the door
It’s coming through the floor”

Obviously written about an experience under the influence a drugs; hearing sounds when there is no one else nearby, and ‘doors coming through the floor’ the lyrics describe the paranoia and visual deceptions that can be experienced from drug use. The Beatles song “Glass Onion” is another example of drug-influenced lyrics: “I told you about strawberry fields … to see how the other half live … looking through a glass onion.”

Again, descriptions of hallucinations (and we all know the Fab Four took LSD) similar to the ones on the Sgt. Pepper album – and to other Beatles tracks – “Strawberry Fields Forever” for example.

Some are more blatant than others for example “Lithium” by Nirvana – Lithium being a drug used to combat manic depression and schizophrenia. Cobain wrote, “I’m so happy, ‘cause today I found my friends / they’re in my head” – a reference to the effects of the drug and how it helped his depression – or at least, how it was supposed to.

Six Feet Under

Despite the surrealistic beauty of many of these drug-influenced tracks, the actions of the musicians are very real – and have often ended in serious illness if not in fact death. The death of a talented musician causes a huge splash in the industry – for example, Nirvana’s soar to fame after Kurt placed a pistol in his mouth. Drug related death causes an even bigger stir, due to the controversy surrounding the activities of the artist and the church-group worry that the fans will do the same. Classic icons of the ‘hippie movement’ of the sixties died from chronic drug use; big names such as Jimi Hendrix left us for barbiturate, Janis Joplin practiced the sins of heroin, alcohol and Valium, and Jim Morrison stopped his own ticker by heroin use.

A band that have suffered from drug- related trauma since their formation on 1983 has been the Red Hot Chilli Peppers. Original Chilli’s guitarist Hillel Slovak (pictured right, with the Chilli Peppers) died after a heroin overdose in 1988, a death which deeply hurt the band and of course its members – Jack Irons, drummer, quit shortly after Slovak’s death to be replaced by Chad Smith. Anthony was affected deeply by the death of his best friend, and his own drug problems – “[I was] just hanging by a thread, I had been so demolished by drug use.” Kiedis was still battling heroin and Flea was a regular drug user when legendary guitarist John Frusciante joined…until 1995 when he left to become a full time junkie. Since the beginning, RHCP have enjoyed success after success, and are still selling out stadiums for their energetic live performances – but the death, destruction and damage caused by the bands drug abuse affected them all severely – well, if you lost your original guitarist, then his replacement through drug use you’d be bummed too! Maybe not in the lyrics (although “Under The Bridge” is based on Anthony’s heroin addiction) but as a band, drug related death and trauma has shaped their careers.

The Who’s Keith Moon died due to a Herminevrin overdose (a prescription drug, how very un-rock and roll) and The Beach Boys’ Brian Wilson has severely damaged health following years of heavy drug use. Ska-punk band Sublime saw the death of their vocalist Bradley Nowell – heroin being the guilty party. Sublime may not ‘practice Santeria’ – but Brad certainly practiced heroin!

There are some artists, who, despite general drug abuse, have recovered and are now clean. Eric Clapton now runs a drug/alcohol rehabilitation centre – a contrast to his solo career days, when he recorded a song merely titled “Cocaine.” Stone Temple Pilots front man Scott Weiland went to rehab twice – firstly court ordered, then of his own accord. Anthony Kiedis, Flea and John Frusciante are now clean – not all drug use ended in tragedy…

Recent news has seen Pete Doherty, ex-Libertine struggle with drug abuse. He quit the band to move to Thailand to sober up. His addiction, as well as meaning he left the band, also earned him a brief spell in prison after he broke into a band mate’s house and stole some of his possessions out of spite – our Pete has lived the famous downward spiral and though his side-band Babyshambles are brewing a storm, The Libs will never be the same. They Cant Stand Him Now … (sorry, we had to).

Promotion

The more blatant form of ‘drug music’ would be tracks that actually promote drug use – or at least, talk about it openly. Such records have caused major controversy within the music industry, namely “Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds” by The Beatles. The media at the time sparked rumours that the song title was actually a play on words for LSD…. “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.” As the Sgt. Pepper album had a psychedelic theme – and, supposedly, was greatly influenced by hallucinogenic substances – people naturally assumed that John Lennon chose the title specifically for that famous acrostic.

But in fact, the title was the name Lennon’s 4-year-old nipper had given to a painting he did at school. The Beatles did not publicly confess to taking LSD until two weeks after the Sgt. Pepper hit the shops, and in an interview with Rolling Stone, John, whilst never denying the song was inspired by countless acid trips, denied that the song title was supposed to reflect their use of LSD:

“Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” . . . I swear to God, or swear to Mao or to anybody you like, I had no idea spelled LSD . . .” Well, Rolling Stone believed you, Lennon…but we ask: was our John-boy just covering his own ass?

Other bands, however, have blatantly promoted substances such as marijuana (Cypress Hill wrote ‘Legalize it, Cypress Hill will advertise it’) and more famously heroin – Everclear wrote a song titled “Heroin Girl” – written about a past lover who died of a heroin overdose. The Velvet Underground, heavy drug users, wrote blatant, potentially controversial lyrics about their drug use in the track “Heroin;” “Cause it makes me feel like I’m a man / when I put a spike into my vein / ah, when the heroin is in my blood…”

However, The VU were an underground band, and probably didn’t pay attention to what the mainstream thought – good on them.

There is a contrast to have ‘taboo’ drugs are now at present times – marijuana is being campaigned to be legalized, and attitudes in general have softened since the LSD freak-outs of the sixties. However, the main contrast with the acceptance of drugs is between the pop scene and the alternative. Remember East 17? Well, Brian Harvey, lead singer of the group and probably the most obnoxious charv in the charts back in ’97, was kicked out of the band after taking up to twelve ecstasy pills in one night and then promoting the drug, claiming “if it brings out the better in someone – and really in the long run, it’s a safe pill and it ain’t doing you no harm – I don’t see the problem.” Big mistake for Mr.Harvey – and the end of East 17. Shame.

Yet in the same year, Noel Gallagher defended him: at an awards ceremony, Noel famously said taking drugs, and ecstasy was like ‘having a cup of tea in the morning.’ Yet was this the end of Oasis? Did the other band members kick Noel out? No. It was merely accepted – a controversial statement yes, but from a controversial musician. That is the major contrast in terms of acceptance.

Lyrics containing supposed ‘drug promotion’ have sparked major controversy within the music industry, particularly in the good ol’ U.S. of A, where attitudes towards drugs and alcohol are less lenient, and anti-substance abuse campaigns are more widely published than in the UK. The media, and anti-drug movements began linking pro-drug messages in the charts to the behavior of young people in America – lyrics from bands such as Oasis, who wrote “Where were you while we were getting high?” in “Champagne Supernova” – were deemed the reason that teenage drug use was on the rise. The number of high school students who saw ‘great risk’ in using marijuana or trying cocaine declined in 1995, a worrying statistic to anti-drug campaigners and American parents alike.

Since 1985, the RIAA have tried to warn parents and students about the contents of artists they listen to via the ‘parental advisory sticker’ – a system successful in both the US and the UK. However, some groups are still worried that the sticker doesn’t efficiently prevent young people from the influences of the bands and their messages. Some radio stations refuse to play tracks with blatant drug references – many radio stations declined “I Get High” by Dada both here and in America. Yet Michael Gurley, of the band, said that “I Get High” wasn’t necessarily about a ‘high’ from drug use. “That ambiguity is part of the song’s appeal. “I Get High” can be taken in many different ways, and as a writer, you want it to be taken in different ways. Sometimes, that’s good art.”

Attitudes towards drug-promoting records are definitely mixed – on reading a thread on a message board about this topic, some members disapproved of such tracks and the potential influence they could have on younger generations – whereas other users disagreed and said that listeners had the right to be informed about such activity. American comedian Bill Hicks, known for his political satire and criticism, summed up the argument in one hilarious sentence; “I think that drugs have done a lot of good things for us and if you don’t believe me then go home and take all your tapes, all your albums and all your CDs and burn them, cos the musicians that made them…reeeealll fuckin’ high on drugs!”

XXXX

It’s Friday night. You text your mates, and choose the nights drinking venue. Bob, however, replies that he’ll be there, but he’s drinking coke, avoiding the Superkings and will NOT chat up lusty Laura behind the bar… Yeah – we were in shock too. Whilst it’s fair to say that many famous bands used illegal substances, and on occasion, benefited creatively from doing so, it is decidedly wrong to tar every alternative band with the same sticky brush. Not every successful rock/punk/indie band have used alcohol, marijuana, or heroin, or LSD – and in fact, led by Ian Mackaye in the early 1980’s, a group of bands from the punk/hardcore scene took this to an extreme and thus created the philosophy, or indeed the cult, that is the straight edge scene. The original philosophy meant no mind altering or illegal substances, no alcohol, and no promiscuous sex – ironically all features of stereotypical rock bands.

Symbolised by the four X’s (XXXX) bands such as The Teen Idles, SSD, Uniform Choice are all part of the movement. These amazing musical contributors prove that it doesn’t actually take drugs to make a decent alternative sound. Huge Welsh band the Manic Street Preachers are a tribute to this: Richey was a self-harmer, anorexic, alcoholic – yet didn’t partake in drugs such as heroin and cocaine. The band has produced some amazing political lyrics and messages, thus proving that without powders, needles and pills bands can be just as influential. Today, there are still bands, and indeed fans that live by the straight edge philosophy, and feel they benefit greatly from it. I bet their Friday nights out are cracking good fun, eh chaps?

What’s It To Be?

So, there you have it; the effects, influences, and disadvantages of drug use within the industry – and, on top of that, the people and the musicians who are against it.

Would the alternative music industry be a better place without drugs?

On one hand, without drugs, Jimi Hendrix would probably still be around, and Janice Joplin would probably be sat in a nursing home listening to her greatest hits. On a more controversial note, perhaps without drugs Kurt Cobain would have lived on and Nirvana would have to try a little bit harder to win the success they now have. Young people would not be hearing the lyrics to “Heroin,” by either Clapton or indeed the Velvet Underground, and the RIAA wouldn’t be going spare over Oasis talking about getting high. But … then again … without drugs, Pink Floyd probably wouldn’t have been so deliciously innovative, and Hendrix would have never written “Purple Haze.” The Beatles would have never dreamt up the surrealistic magic that is “Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds,” and the White Stripes would still be crooning about 7 nation armies alone, rather than strange sounds and imaginary doors.

Let’s face it; the alternative music industry would be a desolate place without drugs. Sure, we’d have the straight edge rockers leading a clean, sober revolution, but where’s the fun in that? We enjoy lyrics that confuse us, that were written when the artists were smashed; we loved reading about Keith Moon (pictured above right) crashing Rolls Royces into swimming pools, and when we play “Glass Onion” on the White Album, we’re secretly wishing we could visit those strawberry fields. So, the choice is yours – appreciate that yeah, maybe your favorite bands were total smack heads – or, start listening to The Spice Girls again, and pick up a copy of Ronan Keating’s latest drivel. You know what to do.

Long Reads

Voiceless City: The Broderick and Promises Unfulfilled

The Broderick were one of the best hardcore bands to emerge from Australia. The musician’s hardcore band. It shouldn’t have ended this way.

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On Saturday June 15 2013, Melbourne hardcore band The Broderick played a 20 minute set at Bang nightclub. The weather was harsh, the crowd was disinterested and The Broderick were a band at the end of their rope. After seven years together that had seen them perform with some of the biggest bands in hardcore including Poison The Well, Converge and Misery Signals, yet had somehow yielded only one full length record, The Broderick were winding down. A week later they would be flying to South East Asia for their very first overseas tour after which they would call it a day. This would be The Broderick’s last Melbourne show. The venue was half empty but overrun with Mall Punks that were too drunk, too stupid and too ignorant to fully understand the significance of what was unfolding on stage. Instead the faux punks, decked out in basketball jerseys and eye liner, moved in hair straightened packs to survey the scene and after quickly realising that it was too unpalatable for their saccharine tastes would sneer as they scurried to the adjoining room to listen to a DJ spin lame 80s metal tracks.

This was to be The Broderick’s last Australian show and it was to take place at Bang- the lowest dive in Melbourne that was renowned for attracting only the most vanilla kids that would go to great lengths to dress up in their “punkest” outfit but actually knew nothing about the music or the scene except that you were supposed to swing your arms into people and make the devil horns during each song. To add insult to injury, The Broderick weren’t even the headliners. Instead they were wedged in between a hair metal tribute act on one side that was fronted by long haired freaks that were so serious and earnest that their performance bordered on parody and on the other side was IExist– a sludgy hardcore band from Canberra with a degree of popularity but nowhere near the quality of The Broderick.

It shouldn’t have ended this way. The Broderick are one of the best hardcore bands to emerge from Australia. The musician’s hardcore band. One of those rare hardcore bands to successfully wed heavy, brooding guitars and beautifully melancholic lyrics to create a whirlwind of emotional intensity that didn’t need the hollow thrills of breakdowns and mosh parts. News that The Broderick were calling it a day should have been greeted with sighs of disappointment and fond farewells. Instead their final moments were spent in a plastic dive in front of kids that could barely suppress a yawn as they waited for the next cheap trick to entertain them. Yet for all their undeniable talent and brilliant music, The Broderick never really got the recognition they deserved. The reason for this injustice? The Broderick.

“TELL ME AGAIN WHY MY THROAT IS CRIPPLED IN PAIN WHILE EMPTY FACES STARE A HOLE THROUGH ME.”

Think of 21st century Australian hardcore and the names that immediately come to mind are Carpathian, Parkway Drive, Miles Away, Break Even and 50 Lions. Over the last eight years The Broderick played with all of these bands and was better than each of them. Tragedy crippled Break Even before they could properly take flight. 50 Lions’ bro mosh schtick wears thin after you turn 24 and realise that swinging your arms around and fly kicking the air isn’t a particularly impressive feat nor a great way to impress women. Miles Away are a strong outfit that always play hard but are too generic to really stand out from the hundreds of other hardcore bands out there. Carpathian’s greatest success, Isolation was loaded with emotional gravitas that put them in the same mould as bands like Modern Life is War and Have Heart, but Carpathian could never properly transfer that emotional punch into their live shows, instead meandering through dull 30 minutes sets that sounded just like the record but without the same intensity. And Parkway Drive, despite reaching a staggering level of international fame and success that no other Australian band has matched, were always just a bunch of surfer dudes that belted out crunching metalcore riffs that were fun to listen to but were ultimately bereft of heart and substance.

The Broderick had all of these bands covered. They were aggressive like Parkway Drive but had an emotional centre that gave them meaning. The Broderick’s slow build ups combined with chaotic, frenzied finales gave them an edge that separated them from the generic pack, unlike Miles Away. In terms of angst and emotional intensity, Carpathian and The Broderick were similar but the fact that The Broderick became more intense and captivating on stage elevated them above their Melbourne counterparts who tended to leave their audiences feeling underwhelmed.

The Broderick brought a level of intensity to their live sets that surpassed every other Australian hardcore band.

The Broderick’s ascent to the best Australian hardcore band was slow and almost didn’t happen. In 2008 they released Illusion Over Despair, a six track EP that was distributed on Washed Up RecordsIllusion Over Despair, with its frantic, distorted guitars was well received within the local scene, cracking the vaunted Short Fast Loud Top 40 Hardcore Albums for 2008. Listening to Illusion five years after its release it’s clear that this was the work of a talented young band still finding its feet. Although the vocals veer too closely towards the throaty, growly, incomprehensible side of the scale, the seed had been planted; their chaotic brand of hardcore was in its embryonic stages and The Broderick was a band to watch out for.

Illusion Over Despair pegged The Broderick as an act on the rise and they soon landed coveted support slots touring with the likes of Poison The Well, The Ghost Inside and Carpathian. Doors were creaking open and all The Broderick had to do was step forward. Instead The Broderick sank into a creative black hole that can happen when you’re five guys in your early twenties with no direction or idea about what to do with your lives. Disagreements broke out, apathy festered and stagnation reigned supreme. The Broderick had hit a wall and the shows dried up. Sure, they still played the odd show at The Arthouse, but it was never enough to build an audience. Like most things in life, the artistic process is all about momentum- you need to be constantly moving forward, to be perpetually building, writing and creating however as soon as you stop, the rot sets in and apathy takes hold. But when you’re bunch of young boys figuring things out, putting one foot in front of the other every day can be the hardest thing in the world. The Broderick were rapidly overtaken by more organised acts and it seemed as though something which had started brightly would burn out.

“I FEAR THIS ANOMIE RUNS THROUGH MY VEINS.”

The next three years would be difficult for The Broderick. They entered a state of almost permanent hibernation; questions about a debut album were usually answered with a shrug or look of disappointment. Infrequently they’d awaken to pick up a support slot for a bigger band or to play a set at Bang or Next, the only two venues that paid a decent appearance fee but only attracted the shallow fans that didn’t care for the moody, atmospheric sound The Broderick were striving for. Creatively the band hit a wall. They knew what they wanted to sound like but the process of actually getting to that sound seemed a long way off. As vocalist Logan Fewster commented: “We found it really hard to write songs. We’d all bring our ideas to practice but we could never agree on anything. Each time someone put forward an idea, the rest of us would criticise it and pay him out. It was a tense environment we created for ourselves and it became difficult to do anything.”

Meanwhile, as The Broderick stagnated, the Australian hardcore scene was changing. New bands were emerging. Melbourne’s Hopeless took the scene by storm with their stellar full length Dear World. Carpathian called it a day and Break Even were dealt a cruel blow that permanently stopped them from getting to where they seemed to destined to go. “Other bands worked harder than us and were more committed. We knew we were as good as them but when it came to actually putting the hard yards in, we kept falling over.” Suddenly The Broderick had transitioned from up and comers to aging underachievers, destined to be discarded and forgotten.

“VOICELESS CITY… REMINDING US OF WHAT WE ARE.”

Out of all music genres, hardcore is most certainly a young man’s game. Hardcore bands are relatively easy to start – all you need is a group of friends, secondhandinstruments and an amp. As long as you’re willing to live rough, play hard and deliver breakdowns, you’ll always be able to pick up gigs. It’s this ease of entry that is hardcore’s greatest strength and weakness. It allows for a never ending influx of new acts to emerge and constantly regenerate the scene, however most of these new bands, for all their enthusiasm, lack the most important and intangible ingredient of all – talent. At the end of the day, energy can only take you so far before repetitive, droning breakdowns bore most listeners and drive crowds away.  Although the hardcore scene remains forever young and vibrant, it’s swamped with mediocre acts that mask the real talent and perpetuate the myth to outsiders that hardcore is nothing but a hangout for thugs, knuckleheads and angry young males.

In this high turnover, limited talent environment most hardcore bands live a short existence. The rump of mediocre groups break up once the novelty of playing shows wears off. The lucky few bands that gain a following, crank out a few records, generally of declining quality, and live in the back of a van as they ceaselessly move from gig to gig. The elite hardcore band, that is the one with seeds of sophisticated talent, usually outgrow their humble roots and evolve into a much more accomplished group, shedding their hardcore skin and reaching for a broader audience.

The Broderick fit none of these categories.

Far too talented to belong with the chump bands, nowhere near successful enough to sustain even a meager living from touring and their sound, though sophisticated and evolving, was not gaining new admirers too quickly. To compound the problem, The Broderick were old. To be in your mid to late twenties in hardcore was to be as old as Moses. Being in a hardcore band means putting the rest of your life on hold. Family, friends, work, education, money. All of these things take a backseat when you’re in a hardcore band. When you’re 19, getting a good job or buying a house feels trivial and the thrill of the stage is all that matters. But as soon as you hit your mid twenties, that excitement has dissipated and instead all that’s left is the grind- the grind of another set played in front of small, disinterested crowds. The grind of underpaid, part time jobs to make ends meet. The grind of watching your friends progress with their careers while you’re still sitting in vans.

The Broderick had reached that stage. Still in the scene but outside of it as well by the dint of their age and the fact that the next generation had already usurped them. The Broderick had reached a fork in the road. Quietly disappear from a scene that had always given them an underwhelming response and wonder what might have been or launch one final assault. One last statement of intent to remind everyone of what had been under their noses this whole time.

After much debate and consternation, The Broderick decided to take the latter option. One last roll of the dice. The band knuckled down and sensing that this was to be their epitaph, summoned up a level of determination that up until now had never shown. Months of toil in the studio culminated in Free To Rot, Free Of Sin. The Broderick’s magnum opus and one of the best records produced by an Australian hardcore band.

“I AM FRACTURED. I SEE THE RUIN IN ME.”

From the first strains of opening track, Black Lung, it’s clear on Free To Rot that The Broderick had hit their stride. The potential for greatness that laced Illusion Over Despair finally blossomed on this 10 track record. The frustration from years of waste and ignorance had boiled over and had manifested itself in this maelstromic album.

The Broderick’s Free to Rot. Released in 2012.

Marc Harpur’s dissonant guitar that blends hardcore aggression with progressive soundscapes gives Free To Rot its unique flavor and provides the soundtrack to mid youth breakdown. What separates Free To Rot, Free Of Sin from its contemporaries wasn’t its aggression or its epic choruses, of which there are many, but its quieter moments. Harpur, showing expert craftsmanship, uses these quiet moments not as lulls in the action or the cost of doing business before returning to more breakdowns, but as opportunities to build the tension. Any band can deliver a crunching riff but very few understand that what transforms an album from just a random collection of songs into a cohesive whole is the ability to weave a narrative and mood through each track so that each song builds on the last and bleeds into each other without the listener even realising it. Harpur’s moody, atmospheric guitar provides that continuity. Even the interlude tracks add to the atmosphere. On “Unseen” muted guitars combine with Ash Denman’s superb drumming to create a feeling of dread and impending doom. As the volume gradually rises, the tension becomes almost unbearable as the listener strains for a release, setting the stage perfectly for the explosive opening to “Low Sky.” Instead of allowing the listener to catch their breath, the quiet moments of Free To Rot, Free Of Sin, close the walls around the audience, squeezing the air out of their lungs as they grasp for respite.

If Harpur’s guitar is the engine that propels this stellar record, it’s Fewster’s pained vocals that elevates this record into rarefied air yet simultaneously grounds Free To Rot with an emotional hold that almost strangles the listener with its ferocity. Fewster, fuelled by his own self loathing and insecurities, becomes a snarling beast desperately trying to exorcise his personal demons. On “Low Sky,” the standout track on a standout album, recounts the final days of a doomed relationship as both parties attempt to keep alive something that had died sometime ago: “We will talk, pretend and reflect / Of course you can’t go through another night like this.” Fewster’s decision to use The Broderick as his confessional is by no means revolutionary but it’s delivered with such sincerity and passion that the listener cannot help but be moved. Such is the level of despair in those pained howls that by the time closing track “Diving Bell” begins to fade and Fewster mourns that “I am empty skies,” the listener will be physically and emotionally exhausted by the significance of what has just been imprinted on their conscience.

“HOW COULD YOU LET GO?”  

Free To Rot, Free Of Sin was the best hardcore album of 2012. It garnered positive reviews from all corners and those that heard it commented on its sophistication and power. The Broderick had arrived. Their ambitious vision for a progressive, moody hardcore album had been achieved, yet as soon as Free To Rot… was released The Broderick began slowing down once again.  A national tour took place, support slots for touring overseas bands were picked up but it was all half-hearted window dressing. The Broderick couldn’t even be bothered to produce a film clip to promote the record for fear of being laughed at and seen as desperate, even though their teaser trailer rapidly generated over ten thousand hits. Even with a masterful album in tow, The Broderick still couldn’t muster the will to get out and push the record into the hands of those who needed to hear it. The haphazard touring schedule resumed and momentum was squandered. Fewster later reflected that “we didn’t promote Free To Rot properly… we knew it was a great record and were proud of it but as soon as the album was pressed we’d all stopped caring.” It was as though the effort required to produce Free To Rot had drained the band of all their remaining energy and now that their last great feat was accomplished were simply going through the motions of touring and support which as a band they were expected to do but the intent was gone.

The key ingredient that made Free To Rot so powerful was its maturity. It was the work of seasoned musicians who knew what they were doing and were determined to see the vision come to life. A band in their teens or even their early twenties could never have produced an album of such sophistication and gravitas. Yet it was this maturity that was now The Broderick’s undoing. Having been through the meat grinder of touring before, they no longer had the stomach to do it again.The problem for The Broderick was that they’d peaked too late. If they’d managed to produce Free To Rot when they were still full of youthful vigour, they may have found the strength to build themselves into what they should have become. Instead they were here. At Bang. In front of an audience that didn’t know who they were and nor did they particularly care. They were old men struggling to keep up in a sport meant for the young.

When asked to assess The Broderick’s legacy, Fewster is reluctant to give an answer but there’s no doubt that he’s proud of the band. “We accomplished a lot, more than most other bands from the scene. Free To Rot is something I’ll always be proud of and grateful to have been a part of.” At the same time, after repeated questioning Fewster can’t hide the pangs of disappointment. “We should have been bigger than what we were. We didn’t reach the level we should have. That’s probably our own fault.

Talking to Logan Fewster about his band is like trying to hold water. He’s hard to pin down and reluctant to say anything, even to those close to him. After careful prompting he finally offers an opinion on why The Broderick never made it to the level he believes they should have- “We fought a lot. Nearly all of us quit the band at some point and we were lazy.”

At that point Fewster’s evasive skills take over and he has nothing more to say but perhaps it’s what he didn’t say that matters most. The Broderick failed not because they weren’t talented enough or because they couldn’t get that lucky break. The Broderick’s ultimate demise was because they were too frozen by the fear of failure to give everything.

“TRACE OUR STEPS AND MAP OUT OUR DESTINATION / WE’RE NOT MOVING, WE’RE STATIONARY.”

The final Bang show began just after 11pm. Close friends of the band, knowing that this would most likely be their last show, turned up to show their support. Parents came along. As always The Broderick play hard and Fewster radiates an animal magnetism that commands attention however the show is a disaster. The sound mix is poor and the vocals are completely inaudible. Ten minutes into the set the bass amp blows up bringing proceedings to halt. The band exchange tense, resigned smirks as they stand awkwardly on stage waiting for a new amp to be set up. Eventually after an unbearable pause, a new amp is found and The Broderick play one last song before exiting the stage. The audience is confused. The crowd is waiting.

We’re still waiting for The Broderick.

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Death Camp Tourism

If these three words create the same reaction in you as they do in me, then all this writing has been unnecessary: Death Camp Tourism.

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Only after arriving in Poland did I learn that visiting Auschwitz is a tourist staple for any Contiki style visit to Krakow. Something you tick off the list, like the Eiffel Tower in Paris or Sagrada Familia in Barcelona.

Learning this put me off more than slightly. The idea of tour companies scrapping each other to ensure your money, fed by swathes of backpackers who visit the death camps by day and then pub crawl by night; it seemed odd. Still, if I was to do one offensively touristy thing then surely I – a student and lover of 20th century history – should choose this one. Besides, it must be quite unique. It must be a change from the other, somewhat tarnished, milestones along the European tourist highway.

That’s the kind of frame of mind I was in. I arrived to Krakow at 7 am and booked a day-tour which had been advertised at the hostel as soon as I got there, before I could even check in. In fact I had already been offered a trip to Auschwitz earlier: outside the train station by a dubious man with a tattered pamphlet offering to give me a ride. And the largest poster on the window of the closed Information Centre had read: ‘Aushwitz-Birkenau Tours Daily.’ So not exactly hard to find. I paid 109 PLN to the hostel reception.

I was picked up outside the hostel one hour later by a man in a suit and black dress shoes called Peter. He drove me, and a British couple he had picked up from a different hotel, to Oscwiecim – the Polish name for an old town outside Krakow better known now by its German label, Auschwitz. For the first five minutes the British couple were clarifying the price of the tour with Peter.

“It said 46 euro, I don’t want to pay more.”

“No problem.”

This says a lot about the modern Auschwitz experience: something in the holiday budget, to be ticked off the list, then to continue with the rest of the itinerary.

So far what I have written has been vague. But I just want to try and evoke how I felt before the experience. Is this really a memorial? I want to create for you the same sense of scepticism I held before going there. A scepticism I hoped would become a good literary counterpoint to the solemn and sobering experience of the camp itself.  But here comes the kicker… that binary balance never came. This initial feeling, of falsity, of insincerity, has either remained or been heightened following my visit. I do not wish to point the finger of shame at anybody. I’m not saying this should be done better or differently.  I do not know how that would be. All I am saying is that something is not quite right about the Auschwitz experience. Something about what it reveals of the human psyche.  Maybe these three words can evoke for you the same sense they evoke in me. If so, then this entire preamble will be redundant, and you could just keep the image that forms in your mind when you see these three words.  I read these three words on the cover of a book, something like New Eastern Europe, at ‘Massolit’ book store in Krakow. If these three words create the same reaction in you as they do in me, then all this writing has been unnecessary:

Death Camp Tourism.

Simple as that. Usually my account of a historical tour would circle around historical facts and interesting information. Since much of the history of Nazi death camps is well known, and since they present you with a saturation of the history when you are at Auschwitz-Birkenau, too much to remember, I will avoid most of this. But let it be noted, that they did have a lot of informative, readily accessible history presented at the memorial. That is not what I am writing about.  I am writing more about what is not there. What cannot be printed on a board alongside some photos and simply told to you. What has to be felt. What has to be experienced. The reactions. These feelings, experiences, and reactions, sadly, do not result from a visit to Auschwitz.

There are few mantras I believe in more fully than this: those who ignore history are bound to repeat it. So in one regard it is good there is a popular, well established record of this dark chapter in human history. But there is a very stark difference between remembering history and manipulating history. To remember is to feel something, to have a personal reaction to and realisation of; to link a private emotion with a particular event in the past. When I stroll by a WWI memorial, I remember the stories of soldiers who lived through Hell on Earth in the name of Who Knows What.  When I walk through the infamous gates at the entrance to Auschwitz I – “Work makes you free” (rough translation) – I no longer remember the stories of the men who passed under it, for whom anything but was the truth. I do not think of the young mothers and helpless children who fell out of wagons onto the railway platform at Birkenau, underneath its iconic watchtower, unaware that they would only leave its barbed wire confines through one of the chimneys. I do not remember those terrible tales of those tragic people. Instead, upon hearing ‘Auschwitz,’ I remember the three food kiosks and two book shops you pass between the bus-laden car park and the entrance to the camp-memorial. I remember the clicking of turn-styles as you begin to climb the stairs of the Birkenau watch tower. The buildings and paving stones are largely untouched since 1945. The snow is on the ground and the flimsy wooden walls of the cramped wooden huts let in the same fatal chilly draft.  The piles of shoes, of spectacles, of children’s clothes, of hairbrushes, lie in piles. The history is right there in front of me. Yet I remember none of it.

It is not my aim to depict Auschwitz merely as a tacky touristy spot. To be fair, it is still treated with decorum and respect. People are silent and solemn, often wide-eyed and open-mouthed. There is no food, drink, or smoking allowed anywhere inside. But something is not quite right.

The majority of Jewish people taken to ‘Auschwitz’ – the colloquial collective name for Auschwitz I (the original camp), Auschwitz II-Birkenhau (a camp built in 1941, 30 times the size of the first camp) and Auschwitz III – were Hungarian; 430,000 of these died. The name of the houses where Nazis stored stolen valuables from prisoners was ‘Canada.’  These are a few random facts. The numbers, the names, everything is a bit overwhelming. So eventually they lose their impact. The statistics, names, numbers, only confuse. If you want to remember the victims, do not be confronted with an over-abundance of material details. Remember history, don’t choke on it.

Just before the tour started I was thinking of techniques I could later employ to describe the lack of feeling I got upon arrival. I could see the buildings and fences, and still felt like I was nowhere special. Again, I expected this to form an initial sense of disappointment, which when written down would contrast with and exaggerate the great wealth of sadness brought on from my actual visit. That did not happen. After 3 ½ hours in Auschwitz I and II-Birkenhau, those initial thoughts remained. I walked in silence along the road from the Birkenhau platform to the ruined crematoriums – the walk which for so many new arrivals to the camp was a death walk. On the same road. And I still could not imagine I was anywhere powerful or significant. I stood in the very same dark chamber where a group of Soviet prisoners were the first to be killed en masse by the use of Zyklon B gas–an experiment proving so successful that it became the standard method of execution throughout the Holocaust.

I stood in that room where it was first tried. That stuffy, concrete room. I looked up and a drop of rain fell on my nose. A drop of rain that had dripped through one of the wooden openings down which a small handful of SS men had dropped the first bundles of Zyklon B and waited to see the effects. The same hole through which hundreds of thousands more such bundles would be dropped. A raindrop from that very opening. And still I was unmoved. I did not cry. I tried to well up. I could not.  It was just a raindrop. Instead of filling with disgusted thoughts of how mankind could treat itself, my mind was filled only with the urgency to move forward and not hold up the stream of people behind me. My ears did not hear the imaginary screams of people who stood on this very spot, naked, wailing as they realised, having been fooled right to the end, by the fake showers mounted on the walls, by the Nazi troops telling them to remember the number of the hook on which they hung their clothes so they could pick up the correct ones after their shower, realised for the first time, that this is the spot on which they would die. I only heard the annoying crackle of static through the headphones of my compulsory audio guide. The Nazis embroidered different markings onto their prisoners for identification purposes. The group leaders used stickers to know how many of their group have remembered to meet at the right times. I always had to look out for my group, to catch up with them. If I could see another person with the same sticker, I felt comfortable – I could not be lost.

I did not smile throughout my entire visit, as expected. There was one time, however, when my lips tightened and almost turned upward.  It was a vague sense of irony I got as we ended the tour. I think the irony was lost on all those who either work or visit Auschwitz, but perhaps somebody else felt it.

Tourists come in waves to the site of Auschwitz. They do as a guide tells them, unable to think for themselves. Prisoners from minority groups brought to Auschwitz were forced to speak German. English, the tourists’ lingua franca, is now the most prevalent tongue there, and almost compulsory if you want to understand the signs and placards. It is hard to be inconspicuous when you are forced to wear a sticker labelling you as a member of a certain tour group – an initiative designed to help your guide keep you under better control. My sticker was blue. I saw big orange ones, square yellow ones. The Nazis embroidered different markings onto their prisoners for identification purposes. The group leaders used stickers to know how many of their group have remembered to meet at the right times. I always had to look out for my group, to catch up with them. If I could see another person with the same sticker, I felt comfortable – I could not be lost. All these subtle ironies bubbled up into the half smile I talked about once I got to the end of the tour of Auschwitz I: we had to line up and hand back our audio guides. First, we were told, you had to unplug the headphones. Then we had to hang these on a metal rack, just like the person in front of and behind us. Then we had to hand our radio receiver box, after we had switched the channel back to 5 and turned it off, to an expressionless man with a badge around his neck. Of course we all did this without question or complaint. It’s easy to follow somebody else. Then we were told to go and wait by the white van in the car park, so we could be counted. Everybody had to be there. Everybody was. The van took us to Auschwitz II-Birkenhau.

In noticing the unintentional parallels between then and now I at first almost chuckled. Then I realised how sad this really was. The only part of the visit not designed to make me remember this terrible history, was the only part which did so. Only through this comical irony did I remember the sad story of those victims of mankind, and realise also the sadder story: that this dark chapter of history is not an anomaly. These victims are a by-product of humanity, a result of how we think, act, and treat each other, just part of a tragic production line that started long before any of us were born, and will continue to operate long after all of us have disappeared.

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